The Implosion of Becoming Fools

A year ago today, we were in Guatemala documenting the implosion of Becoming Fools.

We were three days away from a big theatrical event called “Voz de las Calles”, which was the culmination of five months of rehearsals with street youth and professional entertainers. The road had not been entirely smooth. In fact, there were some major hurdles along the way. But, with the help of gracious volunteers, it looked like they were going to pull it off.

And then … three days before the show, the bottom dropped out …

One of the street youth with a leading role in the play had been in drug rehabilitation for a year. Three days before the show, he left his rehab and went back to the streets to consume drugs. My heart was broken. This guy wasn’t a “street youth” to me – he was a friend. I was rooting for him and his peers as they wrestled towards their goal of performing on a Guatemalan Broadway Stage.

A year ago today, we didn’t know if they would be able to pull it off. It seemed impossible:

  • Most of the cast were youth who still lived in the streets
  • The original director wrecked his motorcycle and couldn’t continue with the project
  • Funds had not been raised to pay for the theater rental
  • The cast had never finished the entire play in rehearsal
  • One of the lead characters left the show 3 days before the event
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The cast rehearses a symbolic scene where the hero is attacked by shadows.
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This is probably how Roberto, the theatrical director felt, as he tried to pull the show together in three days.
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Scott Moore documents the implosion of Becoming Fools, on his knees.
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A tired cast receives notes after rehearsal.
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The night ended with conflict as one of the cast members quit the show.

We didn’t know what would happen a year ago, but we all walked forward in faith .. Becoming Fools.

We captured a beautiful story that walks a tightrope between tragedy and comedy.

Fast forward to today …

We feel much like we did a year ago. It seems impossible.

We never raised the money needed to finish the film. But we believed in the project, so we subsidized it with our blood, sweat, tears, and personal savings.

The good news is that the film is finished.

The bad news is that so is our funding.

We need your help to share the story.

Will you join us in Becoming Fools and give a tax-deductible donation to help us release the film?

Give a tax-deductible donation.

 

Diving Into Documentary Production

Diving into documentary production is much like diving into the ocean: it’s breathtakingly beautiful, but it can also be overwhelming.

A year ago today, I said goodbye to my family to spend two and a half months in Guatemala working on my film, “Becoming Fools”. I was eager to get to Guatemala and start capturing the story. Prior to my trip, I had been directing the production from the U.S. for a couple of months, which proved to be quite frustrating. Every day brought new conflicts and obstacles that seemed to hinder our progress. It certainly felt that way, especially since bad news travels fast, particularly when you’re trying to achieve something positive. So, I boarded a plane to immerse myself in this film and pursue what I felt called to do.

Saying goodbye to my son to go to Guatemala for 2.5 months to produce Becoming Fools.

I thought that being in Guatemala would somehow bring continuity to our production. I believed that things would become easier with my physical presence in the country. But I was mistaken. Proximity to conflict does not provide an advantage in controlling it. It wasn’t any easier; it was just a different kind of difficulty—one that was, in many ways, even more challenging. I found myself closer to the waves that constantly crashed down on everything, quickly getting swept out to sea just like everyone else.

However, I know two essential things about waves that also apply to documentary film production: 

1. Don’t fight the current.

2. Never swim alone.

Charles Dickens captured this irony perfectly when he wrote, “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness…” This prophetic description certainly applied to the Becoming Fools production. It was grueling, stressful, and at times absolutely heart-wrenching. Yet, it was also one of the most joyful periods of my life. I joined hands with close friends and intentionally dove into the crushing breakers because we believed in something greater than ourselves. We were all swept away by the crashing waves and pushed beyond our comfort zones. But somehow, being together made it better because we weren’t swimming alone. This sense of community—mutual trust and interdependence—gave us the confidence to persevere in the face of enormous adversity. We all dove in together.

Ironically, none of us knew how to swim in the first place. None of us had the capacity to achieve our goal. We had all failed at some point. We weren’t the dream team, and at times it felt like a real nightmare. Yet, our group of seemingly incapable individuals became capable because we were called together by the One who makes all things possible. In this calling, my incapacity provided strength for someone else, and vice versa, when we committed to each other in the collaborative process.

However, working together isn’t easy. It can be chaotic and filled with dysfunction. We all make mistakes and may hurt each other in ways that seem to hinder any progress. A group of frightened people climbing on each other while gasping for air in a surging tide will almost certainly drown one another. But we have a life raft if we choose the right perspective. Over time, the ugliness can cancel itself out in a beautiful equation of grace, provided that it is built on a foundation of God’s love. That love compensates for our mistakes and transforms our self-ambition into a sacrifice for others. Thankfully, that love is a life raft big enough for all of us.

I dove into the ocean of documentary production hoping to make a difference in the lives of youth living on the streets. For the past year, I have been tossed around by a current I cannot control, and I still don’t know where it will take me. Yet, with the support of my fellow fools, I will continue to hold on to this life raft of love that transforms an ocean filled with broken people into an ark of redeeming grace, capable of bringing hope to distant shores.

Why do we keep marching forward in something that seems so foolish?

We are fools.

Why do we keep marching forward in something that seems so foolish? Seriously, sometimes I wonder if I am just stubborn or foolish myself. Either way, we seem foolish for pressing on. Today, I finally finished editing “Becoming Fools”, and we received our first response back from a film festival where we submitted the project. It read:

“I’m sorry to inform you that your project was not selected … Best of luck with your future projects.”

Not exactly the most encouraging news on this milestone of production.

Let me set the stage for this message. I’ve been working on the “Becoming Fools” documentary for two years, full-time for the last year and a half, and honestly, “full-time” is an understatement. It’s more like 16 hours a day, six days a week. I don’t share this for sympathy; I share it to emphasize just how truly foolish I feel.

From the very beginning, every step of this journey has felt foolish. It’s been a marathon of impossible hurdles designed to challenge our resolve to keep going:

– The protagonist of the story passed away while we were in pre-production.

– Amelia and I lost our day jobs within three weeks of each other, leaving us without a secure income.

– Our Kickstarter fundraiser failed to raise the necessary funds to produce the film.

– Funds were not raised to pay for the live theatrical event documented in the film.

– The lead character of the live theatrical event quit and returned to the streets.

– We had 485 hours of footage that needed to be translated before we could edit it down to feature length.

– The editing process took five months, working 16 hours a day, six days a week.

– We missed the opportunity to enter several major film festivals for the season.

– Technical difficulties complicated the finalization of the edit.

– Our first film festival notice was a rejection.

– We currently lack funds to release the film.

And yet, we continue. Why?

There are days when I wonder if I have wasted the last few years of my life investing in this seemingly foolish endeavor. Some days, it really stings and makes me feel like a total failure. But then I take a deep breath and remember why we started this project: it is a story that needs to be shared to inspire others.

What is failure? What is foolishness? Italo could be seen as both. He lived his life in accordance with the passion that God gave him, risking everything to care for kids who seemed unlikely to change. In fact, many of the children he helped still struggle with addiction and have not completely left the streets. But Italo didn’t die in those streets. Instead, his passion sparked the creation of a community of “fools” who believe they can make a difference together.

Was Italo a fool? Yes. Was he a failure? Absolutely not.

Like Italo, we continue because we are “fools” living our lives according to the passion God has given us. With that purpose in mind, there is no way we can fail. So, we keep marching forward.

2012 was a year of adventure and blessing for Athentikos

2012 Athentikos Collage

We are grateful to share our journey from 2012 with you:

Athentikos took a risk by beginning production on the Becoming Fools documentary without full funding, believing that God would provide. As of December 2012, the film is 75% complete.

For over five months, homeless youth were mentored by professional artists in preparation for a live theatrical event aimed at raising awareness and inspiring community involvement in the fight against homelessness. Athentikos fully funded the clowning classes and the theatrical production.

Ericha Penzien spent seven months in Guatemala facilitating film production and managing rehearsals for the theatrical performance. We were also blessed to have our first production intern, Brandon Rojano. 

Scott Moore dedicated two and a half months to Guatemala to build relationships with homeless youth, mentor Guatemalan production volunteers, and capture footage for the Becoming Fools documentary. Our work gained visibility through features in magazines, radio, and television.

In June, Athentikos partnered with Guatemalan churches, NGOs, and local and federal governments for a consultation event to address homelessness and present an official report to the Guatemalan government. During this month, homeless youth shared their stories through a theatrical performance in front of over 400 people at Guatemala’s historic Teatro Abril.

We captured more than 485 hours of footage for Becoming Fools. As part of the project Reparando, Shorty had the opportunity to share the stage with Guatemala’s Vice President and present his testimony to over 10,000 high school students.

  • Athentikos was part of a leadership team with Lemonade International and Vidas Plenas to host an annual art camp for 100 at-risk kids in the La Limonada community, Guatemala. Through individual donations and a grant from LEGO, Athentikos provided over 70% of the funding for this initiative.
  • Vidas Plenas received a $64,102 grant in response to the awareness raised by our documentary, “Reparando”.
  • We believe that stories inspire change and hope. We are thankful to share these incredible blessings from 2012, which would not have been possible without your support!
  • Please help Athentikos continue inspiring through the art of storytelling by making a tax-deductible gift of $50, $100, $200, or more. Your investment will yield exponential returns as it inspires through storytelling in 2013 and beyond!

Thank you for believing in our mission and generously sharing your time, talent, and resources. Together, we are all part of this inspiring story!

www.athentikos.com

To Become a Fool

By: Tyler Bradley

It is crazy to believe that a little over a month ago I was in Guatemala with some amazing people, spreading the Gospel and capturing life in a very raw sense. I have been out of the United States several times, but this was the first trip that had a layered agenda, to document a broken world in hopes to rebuild it, to help people along the way, to show and share love, and to bring back the need for help and share that with others. I thought that was going to be the extent of what happened on this journey, but little did I know, it would change my life in a significant manner.

 If someone would come up to me and say, “would you help us shoot a documentary out of the country for a couple of weeks?” Without a doubt I would say yes, however this wasn’t just some ordinary excursion of a documentary, rather this is a sequel if you will. Athentikos’s first documentary, “Reparando,” weighed heavily on my heart when I watched it. The film gave insight into various serious issues in Guatemala and the need for outside help because help within is sparse. The documentary showed me how shattered a civilization, yet at the same time how Guatemalans continue to trudge forward and overcome adversity. That said, that was even more of a push for me to go on this trip to document footage for Athentikos’s second documentary “Becoming Fools”.

I will admit I was scared to go to a country I had never been to, where there would be some culture shock and where I could personally experience some adversity.  I went down there blindly, only knowing one person, Bobby Marko. I knew I was going to serve a loving and gracious God, so with that instilled in me, everything was going to be just fine.

Upon my arrival in Guatemala I had a warm welcoming from the Athentikos crew, as well as a lot of Español! I knew I had made the right decision the second I met everyone. From there on, I knew I was there to minister, serve, and do my job as a camera operator so we could influence the rest of the world and bring this story to them. The one thing I wasn’t counting on was changing my own outlook.

Without stringing this on, I was broken of my own walls and priorities, God showed me a side of life I had never seen before and He wasn’t holding anything back. Visualize this, a child who is barely a teenager, or even younger, who is just now entering the 6th grade. To us, we would see them as youthful beings, probably playing a sport after school or doing some extracurricular activity. In the United States, we see the youth as a precious generation. Yet let’s take this same age and apply it to a child in Guatemala. They are probably living on the street, don’t have a family, hardly any education, are malnourished and addicted to any drug they can get their hands on.

For me, seeing children struggling to live, to look to the future and see no hope, not to know love or God just kills me inside. To experience their lives as we did was so shocking, eye-opening, and at the same time humbling. If I could pick a day that impacted me the most, it would be when we drove around looking for children selling goods on the streets. We encountered a group of people ranging from about 10 to about 40 years old. We got out and did some interviews with them, but what became glaringly clear is how these children and adults were coping with their street life, which was by huffing solvent. It is one thing for me to see a grown man or woman doing drugs, but when you visit a 10-year-old child huffing solvent to quench their hunger, it does something to you. And even more so, while we were interviewing these children, the local police drove by and honked at us to get out of the street, and you can see that they could care less about the children who are addicted to drugs, not but 5 feet from us. In a sense, as I am writing this, I am speechless because words cannot describe how hopeless these children and adults are, how this is their release, and that to them this is the best way to live.

If there were one thing that can influence/inspire others to lend a hand and support the street kids of Guatemala, I would say that the severe dependence on drugs is the most motivating factor.  Now don’t get me wrong, not all hope is lost, there are some children who, with guidance, find a way out of the addiction, but the lack of guidance and love is what is keeping the other kids on the street.

I think the documentary “Becoming Fools” will change people’s lives and break them in the same way this experience broke me. It will make you not only want to help these street kids, but it will make you re-evaluate your own life. We are so fortunate and have so many resources readily available to us that we live a sheltered life. I was living a sheltered, comfortable life myself, living day to day, finding happiness in monetary items, and not praising God the way I should. Yet to see a child smile or a glimpse of hope in their eye because you are there to help them, to show them a way out of the darkness and spread that word to others around the world… that is the meaning of life and that is where true happiness should be found, in knowing you are helping someone else in their life struggle and that because of you and the faith you have, these kids have hope and see a brighter future. I would say “I have been fooled,” that I was a prime example of someone who needed a wake-up call, and that a material world had tricked me. Yet to have become a fool and realize what life really is about is the most rewarding factor of it all.

 

We Believe Because We Are Becoming Fools

Guatemala’s statistics seem hopeless, but we believe we can make a difference because we are Becoming Fools. We spent the afternoon with an incredibly sweet family who are featured in Becoming Fools. A single mother who was deaf and mute, was murdered in February, leaving her four children to live with their grandmother. That is sad enough … but the story continues. These children sell candy on the streets at night to help their grandmother make ends meet financially. In fact, the eleven year old son had to sell candy on the streets the day after his mother’s death in order to pay for her coffin. This reality is what we hope to document in our documentary, Becoming Fools.

We Believe Because We Are Becoming Fools

I stepped on a plane on April 23 to travel to Guatemala to continue production … and haven’t stopped since. We continue to document the story that unfolds before us. It is sad at times, and often overwhelmingly so. But we have also witnessed incredible joy as street youth prepare for their theatrical event on June, 16. These precious kids who were once only familiar faces have become friends and we are thrilled to watch them grow. It will be difficult to capture their stage performance because I know our eyes will be full of tears!

As we had hoped, Becoming Fools is more than a film. We believe it is a movement!

Momentum has grown in ways that we could have never imagined. In addition to film production, we have engaged in meetings with NGO’s, GO’s, churches and media to plan the week long event named Festival: Voz De Las Calles (Voice of the Streets). Groups and organizations are collaborating like never before, and rallying together around the idea that “together is better”.

We are more than tired. Our journey has been a trail of impossibilities and we still have a ways to go. We are the under dog – under staffed, under funded, and told by many that we cannot accomplish what we set out to do. But we choose to believe that all things are possible because we are Becoming Fools.

We still need your help.

Click here to give a tax deductible donation.

Intentional Collisions

Seek the journey that seems impossible & out of reach. That is where you find true friends.

The last three weeks have been full and diverse. Actually, diverse is a nice way of saying stretched thin. We’ve had long days of meetings, researching, scouting, production, logging footage, editing … and more meetings. Toss in lack of sleep and heavy subject matter and you have the perfect scenario to brew a typhoon of emotions.

We are documenting a story that is uncontrolled – many times it seems as if it has no track at all, winding all over the place and crashing into anything in its path. Conflict makes for a great story, but the trouble is you have to capture it …. In the past three weeks, we have:

• Lost a theatrical director to a motorcycle accident
• Potentially lost a major character to the story who has been in rehab for over a year & wants to move out on his own but probably shouldn’t
• Received news that we were not selected for a grant we hoped to receive that would have greatly helped us finish this film
• Been told by several people that we cannot achieve what we have set out to do

But over the same period of time, we have:

• Secured Guatemalan television coverage and interviews for some of our events
• Witnessed NGOs, Governmental, Evangelical and Catholic organizations join together in cooperation to begin a united front in tackling the issue of street youth
• Partnered with another Guatemalan NGO that is helping to resource the live event
• Been blessed with an incredible new theatrical director for our live event
• Developed a relationship with an international TV media
• Sparked an interest from a marketing guru from Pepsi Guatemala
• Watched the youth grow together as they rehearse for the live event

Ultimately, the thing that matters the most in the list above is the last. That is what keeps us going at the end of the day. We aren’t merely telling a story about an issue, we are telling a very personal story about real people who are trying to break the bondage of their circumstances. When I see these kids faithfully show up every week for rehearsal, it breaks my heart and fills it up at the same time. I have seen them both high on solvent and straight as an arrow. I have seen them on the street, in rehab and back on the street. I have seen them cry out in prayer and laugh hysterically at funny moment. Most importantly, I have seen them … as real people … with dignity.

We have a very long way to go in production, and to be honest, I have no idea how this story will unfold. It is frightening, if not overwhelming to feel responsible for capturing all of this into a story that is as fragile and beautiful as the reality in which we currently drift. But I’m clinging to the hope that we are not merely drifting. Somehow these collisions are intentional in eternity.

Renewing the Heart of a Child

One of the greatest blessings of producing documentary film is the opportunity to learn from interviews. It begins as a conversation that in itself is enlightening, but ultimately the wisdom of an interview is revealed at a much more profound level during the editing process. A much clearer picture presents itself when interviews are listened to over and over again in the context of other interviews which make the collective story. Sometimes people say things that seem so simple, yet change my life. Last week I tripped over a statement from an interview that will not let me go.

Fergie is a professional clown in Guatemala City who worked with Italo to develop the idea of a clown school for street children. After Italo’s death last year, Fergie continued this vision with passion and perseverance. We interviewed Fergie in November 2011 as part of our first production trip to Guatemala. He explained how he personally began clowning, and how he hopes to use clowning to help heal street children. I remember being inspired by his noble initiative during the interview and thinking it was a “neat idea”, but I didn’t realize just how profound his vision really is.

… Fast forward …

I have spent the last three months reviewing and evaluating footage and interviews from our November trip. I have read and listened to these stories over and over again. I have read books about street youth and I have listened to lectures about the issue. By no means do I consider myself an expert on the subject, but I do have a greater understanding now than I did 3 months ago. One thing that is unfortunately common in many stories of street youth is abuse. Some family member abused them – often repeatedly. Ironically, these children fled the danger of home to live in the safety of the streets. The memory of this pain often drives them to self medicate and becomes a dangerous cycle of drug abuse.

In a sense, their childhood has been stolen from them. It is this idea which is contrasted by profound wisdom from a clown. Fergie says,

“In the Bible there is a verse that says you must be like a child to enter the kingdom of heaven. And children have a forgiving heart. I´ve seen them fighting with a friend, and half hour later they are playing together again. That (forgiveness) is something that we all should have.”

He goes on to say,

“And a clown has to be like a child as well. A clown is really a child – a silly child. In the same way a clown has to learn to forgive.”

Through the art of clowning, these children have the opportunity to learn forgiveness. This simple yet profound thought deepened my understanding of the Becoming Fools story. In the context of this issue, forgiveness is the first step towards rehabilitation. Anger and resentment drive these children into cycles of addiction. And … Anger and resentment keep these children in cycles of addiction. They will never leave the streets unless they can forgive the people who hurt them the most. Forgiveness is one of the most important parts of the healing process … letting go of the hurt that stings, letting go of the anger that overwhelms, and letting go of the obsession that controls … So that they may find the true peace that they have longed for.

Fergie is living out his faith by reaching out to children who have been abused by family and ignored by society. He isn’t simply teaching them to be silly. He isn’t just giving them vocational training. He is consistently investing in their lives and becoming a father figure they never had. He is teaching them to trust again and let go of their pain. He is igniting dreams and passion in their lives and as result renewing the hearts of children that were once stolen.

And THAT is authentically inspiring.